Thursday, November 30, 2006

Yo, Sly

The basic plot: a retired, widowed, 50-something, former boxing champ who now runs a small restaurant but misses his former profession gets back in the ring to face the current world champ.

The star: a 60-year-old still-working actor who played a boxer in his wildly successful early movies but hasn’t had a real cinematic hit in nearly a decade misses the adulation and gets back into character as the boxer.

The movie: Rocky Balboa.

Really.

I wouldn’t joke about something this ridiculous.

Sylvester Stallone’s new movie comes to a Cineplex near you soon. I guess they forgot how many Rocky sequels were released, so they named this one for the character. For the record, the last one was Rocky V, released in 1990.

You probably know I believe age ain’t nuthin’ but a number, but I also believe that some facets of life should be viewed as age-appropriate. A 50-something, out-of-shape former boxer fighting a 20-something, buff boxing champ is too unbelievable, even in a movie.

I bet Rocky wins the fight. I bet he loses at the box office.

Sly isn’t the greatest actor on the planet, but he certainly deserves better roles than this.

6 comments:

Lee said...

B-

Are you sure this isn't a comedy instead of a drama?

Bernie said...

It might turn out to be a drama that people laugh at in the cinema.

Anonymous said...

it speaks of desperation. i kinda feel sorry for him.

Ian said...

No, you can't REALLY feel sorry for Sly unless you've seen BOTH Judge Dredd ("I...AM...DUH LAW!!") or Stop, or My Mom Will Shoot!

Ian

Bernie said...

Thankfully, I missed both of those.

Anonymous said...

Poor Sly, pickins' must be slim right now for him to take this. File it under "fantasy" if he actually wins the match.